pedialite and red bull = repair kit
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
do nipples grow back?
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