i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
People in love make me want to vomit
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
where does the pee come out of this thing
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
