Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize
