i love accidental penises.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize
