the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize
