i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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