you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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