Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
