As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
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