Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize