Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Randomize
