I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
