On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
