I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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