he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
How external is "for external use only"?
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
The uberlube is also flammable
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
