I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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