drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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