i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
