Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
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