Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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