A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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