they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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