just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
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