No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
