I want to make a zoo with you.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize
