but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Randomize
