I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
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