Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
