Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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