Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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