Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
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