I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
I am spending my child support on dildos
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Randomize
