id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize