i was born a porn star she said
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
We are all done wearing pants today
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
