He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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