Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Randomize
