Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize