wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Randomize
