I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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