he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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