It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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