he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize