3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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