I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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