Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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