Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Randomize
