bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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