I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
