Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
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