She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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