D3 body, D1 cock
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
